Rice Purity Test for Couples: How to Take It Together
Taking the Rice Purity Test as a couple has become one of the most common ways people actually use it. It’s not a separate quiz, just the same 100-question rice purity test, taken by two people who then compare notes.
This guide to the rice purity test for couples covers why couples do it, how to take it the right way, and what to actually do once you see both scores.
Why Couples Take the Rice Purity Test Together
Long-term partners often assume they know each other’s full history. The rice purity test for couples has a way of proving that assumption wrong in a low-stakes, often funny way.
The 100 questions cover relationships, physical experiences, social life, substances, and personal milestones. In almost any relationship, there are a few items on that list one partner has done that simply never came up in normal conversation.
The rice purity test for couples doesn’t create those stories. It just gives two people a structured, non-awkward reason to ask about them.
How to Take the Rice Purity Test for Couples
The order you do this in actually matters. Here’s the approach that avoids the most common mistake when running the rice purity test for couples:
- Take it separately first. Each partner answers all 100 questions alone, on their own device. This keeps one partner’s answers from influencing the other’s.
- Finish completely before comparing. Don’t peek at each other’s screens mid-test. Get your full, honest score before any conversation starts.
- Reveal scores at the same time. This keeps it fair. Comparing scores after the fact, rather than watching each other answer in real time, keeps the results honest.
- Talk through specific questions, not the whole list. Going question-by-question through all 100 items can feel like an interrogation. Pick a handful that surprised you and start there.
There’s no fixed way to structure the follow-up conversation. Some couples turn the rice purity test for couples into a whole evening. Others go through a few standout questions and move on. Either way is fine.
What a Score Gap Between Partners Actually Means
Seeing a large difference between two partners’ scores is common in the rice purity test for couples, and it doesn’t mean what people sometimes assume it means.
A large gap
A big gap usually reflects different backgrounds, environments, or timing rather than a difference in values. Most of the experiences behind that gap happened before the relationship even started. They’re part of who your partner was before you met them, not a comment on the relationship itself.
A small gap
A small gap often just reflects similar circumstances, like overlapping friend groups or similar upbringings. It doesn’t mean two people have had identical experiences. Two very different individual answers can still add up to a similar total.
The same score
Two partners landing on the exact same number is mostly coincidence. Different checked boxes can add up to the same total just as easily as they can produce a gap. A matching score isn’t proof of a matching history.
Ground Rules for the Rice Purity Test for Couples
A few simple agreements can keep the whole thing feeling fun instead of tense:
- Treat it as curiosity, not evaluation. The goal is learning something new about your partner, not scoring them.
- Nobody has to explain every answer. If a question touches something your partner isn’t ready to discuss, let it go for now. It can come up later.
- Remember the test measures a lifetime, not the relationship. Most items on the list predate the two of you meeting. They’re history, not current behavior.
- It’s fine to stop or skip sections. If something feels uncomfortable, there’s no rule that says you have to push through it.
These same ground rules (curiosity over judgment, patience with sensitive topics) are echoed in general relationship-communication research from groups like the Gottman Institute, which studies how couples talk through unfamiliar or difficult topics in ways that strengthen rather than strain a relationship.
New Relationship vs. Long-Term Relationship: Does It Change Anything?
The experience of the rice purity test for couples is a little different depending on how long you’ve been together, though the test itself doesn’t change.
Early in a relationship, it can cover a lot of biographical ground quickly, in a format that feels less loaded than a direct “tell me about your past” conversation. Framing it as a fun activity rather than an interview tends to make people more comfortable engaging with it honestly.
In a long-term relationship, most of the value comes from surfacing specific stories that simply never had a natural opening in years of conversation. It’s less about learning brand-new facts and more about finally sharing details that were sitting there unspoken.
Some couples also retake the rice purity test periodically just to see how each person’s number has shifted over time, treating it as a light yearly check-in rather than a one-time event.
If the Results Bring Up Jealousy
It’s a normal reaction, especially around questions in the more physical or romantic categories. If it comes up, it helps to pause and ask yourself a specific question: are you reacting to the experience itself, or to the fact that you didn’t know about it until now? Those two things call for different conversations.
It’s also worth remembering that a partner’s experiences from before your relationship are part of the life that shaped who they are now, including the person you chose to be with. A fuller history isn’t a threat to what the two of you have built since.
What This Test Isn’t
A few things worth being clear about before you take the rice purity test for couples:
It isn’t a compatibility test. Two people with nearly identical scores can be a poor match, and two people with very different scores can be great together. The rice purity test measures past experiences, not future fit.
It isn’t a measure of fidelity or character. A lower score doesn’t mean someone is less trustworthy, and a higher score doesn’t mean someone is more devoted. The number reflects history, not commitment.
It isn’t a relationship requirement. Plenty of couples never take it together at all. It’s an optional activity, not a test either partner needs to “pass.”
How the Couples Version Compares to the Standard Rice Purity Test
| Standard Rice Purity Test | Rice Purity Test for Couples | |
|---|---|---|
| Questions | Same 100 questions | Same 100 questions, no separate couples-only version needed |
| Who takes it | One person, individually | Both partners, each answering privately |
| Scoring | 100 minus each checked item | Identical scoring, just compared side by side afterward |
| Purpose | Personal reflection or comparing with friends | A structured way to talk about each other’s past experiences |
| Official source | ricepuritytest , run by The Rice Thresher | Same test; “couples” is just a way of using it, not a separate official edition |
Common Misconceptions About the Rice Purity Test for Couples
| Misconception | Reality |
|---|---|
| There’s a special “couples version” of the rice purity test with different questions | No. It’s the same 100-question test. Couples just take it separately and compare results |
| A big score gap is a warning sign | It’s extremely common and usually reflects different backgrounds or timing, not incompatible values |
| You have to explain every answer to your partner | Nothing requires that. Discussing a few specific questions is enough for most couples |
| The test measures how faithful or trustworthy someone is | It only counts past experiences. It has no way to measure character or commitment |
Frequently Asked Questions
Should couples take the rice purity test separately or together?
Separately at first. Each partner should answer all 100 questions alone, then come back together to compare and discuss. Answering side by side in real time can lead to softened or influenced answers.
What does it mean if my partner’s score is much lower than mine?
It usually just means they’ve had more of the listed experiences, most likely before your relationship began. It isn’t a reflection of your relationship or their commitment to it.
Is it a bad sign if we don’t want to take the rice purity test together?
No. It’s an optional, casual activity. Plenty of couples skip it entirely without it meaning anything about the relationship.
Can the rice purity test for couples cause an argument?
It can, if either partner treats it as a judgment tool instead of a conversation starter. Going in with agreed ground rules and genuine curiosity avoids most of that risk.
Is there a different, official “couples” version of the test?
No. There’s only the one standard 100 question rice purity test. “Taking it as a couple” just describes how two people choose to use the same test, not a separate edition of it.
Ready to Take It Together?
Head back to the Rice Purity Test to take the full 100-question test. If you want a deeper breakdown of what your individual number means first, check out our Rice Purity Score Meaning guide.